Surviving or Thriving: What’s in Your Survival Kit?

When Life Feels Heavy

We all know those nights where it feels like the whole world is on your shoulders. Dinner still needs to be cooked, homework is waiting, baths are overdue—and then you realize you haven’t even eaten yet.

That’s usually the moment survival mode kicks in. The kids are depending on you, your partner needs you, and you—well, what do you need? Maybe the answer is a survival kit. Not the kind with snacks and Band-Aids, but one that helps you breathe and keep moving forward when life feels heavy.

Understanding Survival Mode

When you’re in survival mode (sometimes called “distress”), your brain is basically sounding the alarm. Some people call it the “red brain” or “mid-brain,” but whatever name you use, it’s your body’s way of protecting you.

It can show up as:

• Tight muscles or stiff shoulders

• Shortness of breath

• Hot flashes or sweating

• Snapping or getting irritated quickly

• Feeling overwhelmed or worn down

These are signals—your body saying, “Hey, something’s off.” The first step is to notice them. The second step? Make a plan.

Plan A: Lean Into Your Village

You weren’t meant to do this alone. Remember that village we’ve talked about? This is when you call on it. Let a friend drop off dinner. Ask a family member to take the kids for an hour. Send that text.

And if you don’t feel like you have a village, start building one. Pay attention to who shows up, not just in words but in actions. The biggest step is asking. And when you do, you’ll see who’s truly in your corner.

Plan B: Share the Load at Home

Here’s the thing—if there are three or more people in your home, then everybody can play a part.

• Make a simple task list or chore chart.

• Break things down into small, medium, and large tasks.

• Pass them out and keep it flexible.

Life changes—school, work, holidays, sports—but the key is: you don’t have to carry it all. Sharing the load not only lightens your stress, it teaches responsibility and teamwork in your family.

Plan C: Give Yourself Permission to Rest

Not everything has to be done right now. If it can wait, let it wait.

Take the break. Sit down. Breathe. Rest is not a weakness—it’s wisdom. When your body and mind tell you it’s time to slow down, listen. And remember, it’s okay.

The Heart of It All: Thrive

If there’s one thing I want to leave you with, it’s this: don’t just survive—thrive. When you thrive, you show up as the best version of yourself, and that blessing spills over to your whole family.

And let’s be real—we all still have survival days. When life really starts “life-ing,” I circle back to these same plans. But what grounds me most is leaning into God’s Word.

My Anchor in Scripture

One scripture that carries me is:

Colossians 3:23-24 (ESV)
“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.”

That verse reminds me that even in the messy, everyday moments—whether it’s cooking dinner, folding laundry, or juggling schedules—whatever I do, I can do it wholeheartedly. God knows it’s tough sometimes, and He gives us the kind of strength we can only get from Him.

So when you feel like you’re stuck in survival mode, remember: you are doing a greater work. Some rewards you’ll see right away in peace or joy. Others are waiting for you in heaven. Either way, you are not walking this road alone.

Final Thought…Lean on your people. Share the load. Take the break. And always remember—you were made to thrive, not just survive.

With Love,

Chioma

Where’s Our Village? Because This Mom Is Tired-Tired

By Chioma

The Lightbulb Moment

Hey Mommas — and Poppa’s too!

So the other day, I’m stretched out on the couch, scrolling my phone, trying to take a quick mental break… all while fully knowing I had about five things waiting on me. (Don’t judge me, I know you’ve been there too!)

Then — buzz — I get a text from someone near and dear to my heart. It was a meme. And not just a funny meme… it was that meme. The one that hits way too close to home about the kind of exhaustion we’ve all been feeling lately.

Not “I stayed up too late” tired. Not “one nap will fix this” tired.
I’m talking about the kind of exhaustion that doesn’t even make sense. The kind that makes you feel guilty, broken, and maybe a little ashamed for not being able to just “push through.”

Doing All the Things

My friend and I? We’re both working moms, married, with kids in extracurriculars, active in our churches, and juggling about fifty other things. I got exactly what she meant.

I couldn’t magically make her feel rested, but I could remind her of the truth:

You’re doing a hard job, and you’re doing it beautifully.

We’re managing all the people and all the things we’ve been blessed with — and yes, blessings can feel heavy sometimes.

The Convenience Conversation

I told her, “Girl, maybe you just need to hire some help.”

Because let’s be real — in 2025, you can hire someone to:

• Clean your house

• Drop off and pick up the kids

• Cook your meals

• Deliver your groceries

Honestly, I’m in my “I’ll pay for convenience” era — especially if it means more time with my family.

But here’s the truth: even with help, that deeper exhaustion? It doesn’t just disappear.

The Real Problem

Somewhere along the way, we started believing we should be able to carry it all. But guess what? We weren’t built that way.

God never intended for us to hold every burden alone.

We don’t have to be “Superwoman” to be good moms. What we do need is:

• Support

• Encouragement

• Sisterhood

• Adult conversation (because sometimes toddler talk just ain’t enough)

• Hobbies

• Things that spark joy in us

But here I am, missing sweet life moments because my brain is stuck on the laundry sitting in the washer. (Insert scrunchy face emoji here.)

Where the Village Went

As we kept texting, it hit me: we don’t have the same village our parents had.

Remember when you’d get dropped off at an auntie’s house for a few hours? We didn’t care why — we were just happy to be there.

And for our parents, those hours meant:

• A chance to rest

• Grocery shop in peace

• Go to appointments without a sidekick

• Just breathe

Sounds like luxury now, doesn’t it?

So, Where Is Our Village?

Maybe they’re working long hours. Maybe they’ve moved far away. Or maybe, like us, they’re so busy trying to keep their own lives afloat that they forget to reach out.

But here’s your permission slip: Ask for help. It’s not weakness — it’s wisdom. And the payoff can be beautiful.

Let’s Build It Back

I’m ready to see the village make a comeback. I’m ready for the kind of support that reminds us we’re not alone in this motherhood thing.

So tell me — where’s your village? And what would it take to bring it back?

Want more mom-talk like this?
Join my email list for real-life conversations, resources, and little nudges to help you create your own modern-day village.